Anti-depressant

Whenever my birthday draws near, I can't help but feel sad, but I don't let it defeat me. If I had, I'd have committed suicide a long time ago. I try to fight it, and in every war, a soldier must have his weapon. In my battle against depression, I usually look towards songs for strength, inspiration, or hope, and these are the some of the lyrics that I use to continue with my life.


"Don't stop / Never give up / Hold your head high and reach the top / Let the world see what you have got / Bring it all back to you"

lyrics from "Bring It All Back" by S Club 7, from the album S Club, composed by E. Kennedy, Tim Lever, M. Percy, and S Club 7.

That song is just so perky. It never fails to make me smile, and it also energizes me. It's like a dose of sunshine or a jolt of electricity that jumpstarts my mood. Whenever I feel that I can't work anymore, or I can't bear something, I could just hum the tune or repeat that part of the song in my head, and I feel fine. Some people call it old, cheesy, or corny, but it keeps me happy.

"I will not let you define / Everything I am by one thing that I don't have / Cause I'm more than that"

lyrics from "Anymore" by Emmy Rossum, from the album Inside Out, composed by Emmy Rossum, Vince Pizzinga, and Stuart Brawley.

That song might not be popular since it was released in 1997, and I just heard it this year, but it surely took me out of a funk after a recent breakup. After that breakup, I kept on thinking that I might not have been good enough; there's something wrong with me; I'm unloveable; I'm hollow; and I'm worthless. Hearing those words while I was on my commute to the office immediately sparked a surge of emotion that I could only describe as enlightening. It's true; I'm more than my flaws. I have good things in me that I can offer to the world.

"You said that you would die for me / You must live for me, too"

lyrics from "Cat and Mouse" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, from the album Don't You Fake It, composed by Ronnie Winter.

Those are words that I need to live by (and perhaps other people, too). It's more metaphorical rather than literal, but either way, it makes sense to me. I can't just say that I love a person. I must do everything I can to get that love across. Considering the lyrics, I wouldn't want someone who would sacrifice herself, knowing that I'll be sad when she's gone. Even if it seems that dying for another is the ultimate sacrifice, I think that living, not just existing, is the better way to go. It's like living life to the fullest, focusing on good things that are worth waking up in the morning for. It's a reminder to be happy with the person I love. I know its sappy, and I don't know if my point is clear, but I'm crossing my fingers.

There are other lyrics that help me through my depression, but these three had the biggest impact on me this year. One reminds me to keep going. Another tells me that I can offer good to the world, and the other reminds me to continue living life to the fullest in the hopes that it could make another person happy. With those words, I don't really think that I'll be beaten by my depression. I just can't wait to get over this funk.